Missing you x

Dear Daddy,

Today has been hard, no, everyday has been hard. Today they collected you from the hospital, we gave them clothes for you to wear. You always looked smart, never without a shirt and tie, we sent your best suit (we had it dry cleaned of course!) and I got you a new shirt, socks and pants, we polished your shoes and chose you a tie, I hope you like what we chose for you. I got you a bible to take with you aswell it felt important that you should have that, and Katie put in a beautiful photo of the two of you when you went to Barcelona. I hope you know that we are all so proud of everything you achieved in what was supposed to be a little retirement job but turned out to be something you excelled at, of course due to your incredible personality. So many people thought so highly of you, myself included. You are back in Cardigan now so you can expect a few visitors over the next couple of days. You will be coming home for the last time on Wednesday, I think that is what you would want. I hope we are doing things the way you would have wanted us to, we are determined to give you a beautiful send off. We have chosen four hymns for you, you loved to sing and I think they are hymns that you will enjoy and that will get everyone singing. Its going to be so hard following you into church, I am going to read a poem for you that I hope you will enjoy, I will be able to do it because i'm doing it for you daddy and I know you will be with me.
I have put together an album of all the digital photos we have of you, I love it! You are so happy in all of the pictures and that is exactly how I want to remember you. I have decided against seeing you now, it just won't be you, I hope you understand why i've made this decision. I want to remember my Daddy as the vibrant charcter that he was, happy and smiling. I hope you don't feel that i've let you down by not seeing you, I will be there of course though I know you have already left that body, I hope you are still here in someway and that you know how much I love you.
I've been looking at photos from when we went to Berlin, i'm so glad we had that weekend we spent a lot of time together and I enjoyed your company immensely, I always did.

Love you always,

Helen xx